You Don't Scare Me . . . No, Seriously, You Don't

One band that has come up a lot on random Metal websites, Metal memes, and music suggestions on Spotify is Ghost B.C.   They are a Swedish band that is most recognizable by the lead singer usually dressed as a satanic pope, adorning skull face paint.  I have seen many photos of them, and when I saw “Swedish Heavy Metal” I was like, how gruesome and hedonistic.  Lets go for it!

I started streaming their music by clicking on a random song, “Cirice.”  Well, I got to say, not what I expected.  The song sounded like Blue Oyster Cult with heavy base, except it wasn’t  “heavy” at all.  The lead singer, who I thought would have the voice of a tempting evil demon, sounded like a whiny teenager who wouldn’t talk at the dinner table to his overbearing parents.

I tried another song, “Square Hammer.”  Well, this song sounded more like a 60s protest song with a little guitar and drums hanging out in the background.

Hmmm . . .

Then I tried “He Is” which just reminded me of a Christian song, praising the Lord and such (which is fine but I guess not what I would expect from a band that praised Lucifer a few tracks before).

All in all, I get very excited when finding a new band to love but Ghost B.C. is not one of them.  I don’t know if it is because they are from Sweden that we are stupid enough to think, it must be Metal, but there is really nothing Metal about them.

That being said, let’s move on and just say they are not Metal.  Are they any good?  Great question!

No; no they are not.  I get the vibe that they are trying to be unique by mimicking the Catholic Church choir style with a heavy twist but it doesn’t work.  In “Year Zero,” the song starts with lyrical synonyms for Satan and goes on to discuss the takeover of humanity by the Devil and how “he will tremble the nations.”  Sounds scary, right?  Not at all.   You could play this song at your daughter’s 5^th birthday party and no one would notice.

I don’t want you to get the wrong idea.  I don’t look for scary music that threatens the survival of life as we know it.  BUT, when you put yourself out there as a frightening Anti-Christ Swedish Heavy Metal entity—I expect a little more from you.  I feel no emotion towards Ghost B.C.  other than disappointment.

I cannot, in good conscious, recommend Ghost B.C. as a Metal band or as a band that plays well-orchestrated music.  So, when you see their photo next time, just remember that the wizard behind the curtain is a pathetic excuse for rock and roll.