“We should go to a strip club!”
I said this at about 10:30 PM on a Wednesday night after attending the Twins of Evil: Rob Zombie & Marilyn Manson concert at the Hammerstein Ballroom in midtown. It just made sense to me at the time that after a rock concert, you would head to the nearest strip club. Perhaps it was the overpriced cocktails or the sexualized images displayed on large screens during Zombie’s performance, but I was ready to see some ladies! So, I asked a cop on the street where the nearest strip club or gentleman’s club was and luckily, he had a few suggestions.
The next morning, I woke up over $400 poorer, body glitter on my face, a bad hangover headache, and a napkin stuck in my pocket with a woman’s phone number written on it.
If you don’t enjoy going to strip clubs, I totally respect that. It is CLEARLY not for everyone. I have only been to a strip club/gentleman’s club a handful of times. But each time—it was an experience. As a woman, I always got the royal treatment. All the attention is on you (whether you want it or not). I have never received more compliments on my outfit, shoes, hair, etc. All the strippers want to chat with you, all the bouncers and security want to make sure you are safe and having a good time, and all the other guys in the club are looking at you in awe because, who is this random chick having fun at the strip club? It is a little uncomfortable when you first walk in, but eventually, you do feel comfortable. Strippers are a nurturing people. They want you to feel at ease because if you do, you stay longer and spend more money.
Another reason that strip clubs are a lot of fun is the music. Just think of how many different types of people a strip club has to please: male customers, female customers, plus all the dancers and then the waitresses; spouses that are reluctantly there with their arms crossed. The music better be good. At most stores, restaurants, and bars the music is an afterthought. You are going to a store for the merchandise, the restaurant for the food, and the bar for the drinks. At a strip club, you are going for the . . . well you are going for the women (or men) but the performance that you are there to witness is dependent on the music. Take the music away and you are in a dark room with women standing on stages in tacky outfits. Music is so important at a strip club. If the dancers are not digging the music, the customer is not going to be digging them. The business model crumbles.
In my limited experience of going to strip clubs, the music is is always awesome. There is always a mix of songs I have never heard before, songs that I loved but had forgotten about, and hits that everyone wants to hear. The playlist ranges from “oh, I love this song” to “wow, never thought I would hear this in a strip club,” to “where has this song been all my life?” I have always left a strip club like I leave a concert. After a good concert, I always start downloading and listening to the music that I heard. I want to relive it. After a visit to a strip club, I always start listening to the songs I heard. I suddenly have a whole new list of music to rock my world.
Whether you have been to a strip club and hated it, go all the time and love it, or have never been and never intend to, you cannot deny there are some great tunes that get popular from their pole appeal (I just made that up—copyright).
So here I give to you my stripper mix. Enjoy and maybe see if you might have a new career calling, wink.
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